Monday, September 10, 2012

Marvelous Mondays: 5 Reasons to Say Yes

For the past seven years, my good friend Mike has wanted me to come with him to the Wheatland Music Festival. For seven years I've made up excuses for why I can't go or flat out said no to the offer. I've resisted for so long because I was a bit nervous of what I would find there. Mike is a bit of hippie (that's an understatement) and the music offering is mainly folk and bluegrass.

You're likely to find lots of peace-loving, tie-dye wearing, dreadlock sporting people and plenty of interesting smells ranging from human odor to illegal substances wafting through the trees. I learned what a dulcimer was, that there is a technique to playing the spoons, and that there are more than one kind of banjo and mandolin.

It was this combination of very foreign things that always made me a bit apprehensive. Like high school all over again, I wondered, would I fit in? Would people like me? Could I be enough of a tree-hugger? Could I make it without a shower?

So, when Mike asked me again this year if I'd like to go to Wheatland I initially did my hemming and hawing about whether I could make it and finally decided that I had nothing to lose. It turns out that I had a fantastic time (though I am exhausted) and I learned a lot about why it is always a good thing to say yes. The following are 5 reasons you should always say 'yes' when the opportunity is presented.

1. Saying Yes Can Really Shake Up Your Routine-
I live a pretty boring life right now. I wake up at my scheduled alarm, make breakfast and drink coffee. I usually watch a show from the previous night or do a crossword, jump in the shower, dress, and drive into work. If I time it right I can hit all the green lights. I'm kind of like Harold Crick, minus the counting of the tooth brushing.

So, when I packed my car with a sleeping bag, camping clothes, and non-perishable food items, I realized my weekend was going to be a bit different than the usual routine. I drove on roads that I hadn't been on, I drove in traffic patterns I was unfamiliar with, and I arrived at a place I'd never been before. I saw people I'd never seen before, wearing things I'd never seen before, talking about things I'd never heard of before, and thinking of things in ways I've never thought of before. I've never camped as close to another collection of people as I did this weekend. I literally told our neighbors the time when they were asking people inside their own tent.

But, despite the strange sights and nights that lasted until well after 3 AM, despite an irregular eating schedule and irregular diet, and despite the fact that I didn't know how to contribute to many conversations, I managed to have an awesome time. In fact, I learned a lot about myself and about communities of people. And it certainly shook up my very regular routine.

2. Saying Yes Can Really Broaden Your Horizons-
This festival is very bluegrass and folk oriented. Sure there's a bit of country or country rock or blues and many bands that didn't really have a genre, but almost every band had a harmonica and many had a tall string bass. Banjos and mandolins were everywhere and it was impossible not to go anywhere without hearing a tune being picked.

This music is relatively foreign to me, probably because it isn't on many radio stations and not exactly popular in Detroit, at least to my knowledge. Plus, I always associate folk music with country bumpkins and I think there tends to be a desire not to be seen as such. Its as if the music of the hills makes you a bit backwards or something. And while I learned I am very much accustomed to city living, I can certainly appreciate the music and the talent I saw on stage. My favorite bands were Hoots and Hellmouth and De Temps Antan, though all groups were incredibly talented.

But my horizons were not broadened just in music genres. Between the music, dancing, conversations, and people in general, this festival was certainly good for realizing that there are other types of people out there in the world and that in the grand scheme of things, we're all just looking for a good time.

3. Saying Yes Can Help You Dance-
A festival like this would not be complete without a little bit of square dancing, line dancing, and contra dancing, and you bet your patootie that I danced in them all. But, it certainly took some prodding, and I must say I'm a little ashamed of that.

I like to think that I will try anything. I like to think that I'll agree to do anything and be a go-getter. Yet, somehow, when the time comes to take action, I struggle a bit. And generally this struggle manifests itself through the fear of doing something that I don't know how to do. I become petrified that I'll be wrong, look like a fool, or both. The fear is crippling and it keeps me from enjoying new things. This is a big theme I plan on exploring in the coming weeks.

At any rate, during the first song, I sulked around the edges of the dance hall pretending to enjoy myself. In reality, I really wanted to participate, but that fear of not being good enough crept in. So, I instead continued to pretend that I was enjoying myself or waiting for a friend to come or some other excuse for not getting out on the floor. As the second song got underway, Mike pulled me out on the floor, pointed at a lonely girl and said, 'go dance with her, she's good.' I approached and said that I need an experienced dancer and wondered if she'd like to dance. She happily accepted and away we went.

 I haven't had so much fun in a long time. I learned about the different calls and moves and moved to the beat. I found out that while I was far from perfect, I do have some rhythm and I certainly have fun. And having fun is what dancing is all about.

If I had sat sulking in the corner, I would probably regret that I didn't participate. Instead, I have a great memory and wonder if there are places I could keep dancing. Currently, my only place to cut a rug is weddings. I'm hoping I can find another outlet. Square dance halls best be looking out.

4. Saying Yes Can Help You Find Happy People-
Wheatland was full of happy people. Some of these people achieved these results through excessive use of alcohol or other 'things,' but the majority were simply there for a good time. And what could be better than camping in the woods and listening to music? Seriously. That is not a rhetorical question.

Not only did I need to say 'yes' to come to Wheatland, but saying 'yes' to things such as square dancing, moshing at a concert, and jumping into some jam sessions led to an realization that everyone was there for a good time and people in general are pretty receptive to other people. In a world that can be so dominated by pessimistic things, these types of environments help to keep it in perspective.

Oh yeah, I sang bass in some jam circles, played drums (I don't play those) and took the lead on Gin and Juice, in which I was accompanied by a mandolin, guitar, string bass, harmonica, and violin. And except for Mike every one of those musicians was at least 50 years old.

Snoop Dogg. At a folk festival. Thank you Phish.

5. Saying Yes Can Restore Your Faith in Others
I had my faith shaken a bit in people recently. Besides the conventions and election crap, I also felt very let down by others after a disappointing weekend. I'm generally a pretty flexibly person, but I was stretched to the limit over Labor Day.

To make a long story short, I had planned my Labor Day weekend around a few major events and nothing else. I cleared my schedule to entertain friends and I was hoping for a good time. I spent the days before cleaning and prepping and in general putting all other plans on hold for these couple days.

When the weekend ended, I missed all the things I had planned for except the Tigers game and hardly visited with friends. After prepping for the weekend and staying in for most of the time, I was incredibly disappointed that I wasted so much time doing absolutely nothing. And one of my friends left for California quickly thereafter. It was a mixture of selfish pity and a deep rooted desire to enjoy time with my friends that drove me to such great heights of disappointment.

Wheatland allowed me to see that there are all kinds of people out there waiting to meet you. One thing about hippies is that there is usually very little emotion or thoughts that are hidden. At least in my experience, hippies are very free people who do what they love and nothing else. If they have something to say, they say it. Its an admirable lifestyle in a sense. That is, until you see their feet.

My point is that I had a great time mingling and talking with people whom I'd never met. No one asked what I did with my life and I never asked anyone else. Mostly it was about enjoying the music and loving the weather. Sometimes it was about sharing the beer or some hot dogs. Occasionally it was about sharing a dance. But, it was always about enjoying life and enjoying each other.

How could you ever say no to that?

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