Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Tips for Running in Cold Weather

Its pretty cold out there. The temperature this morning was 17 degrees and with the wind it feels like 10. As winter officially started last week, we all know that there is more of this great stuff in store. Sadly, none of us can stop going outside for several months so I have put together a list of things to think about if you are going to get some exercise in the cold.

This post is also helpful for me because I am preparing for a late January run along Lake Michigan in Chicago. This is most likely going to be cold. Therefore, I need to do some tests before freezing my tush off. Additionally, there are lists out there of cold weather running tips, but I've found that these are either officially sponsored by useless running crap or written by people in California or the deep south where cold weather running consists of 50 degrees and some rain.

Without further ado, some things to consider when running in the cold.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

Go St Louis Half-Marathon

Go St. Louis Half-Marathon
Date: April 10, 2011
Location: St Louis, MO
Finish Time: 1:59:46
Pace: 9:08 min/mi


St. Louis has been a destination for me several times in my life and I've driven through the city countless times on our way to Arizona. As the city likes to say, it really is the 'Gateway to the West.' Face it, they even made an arch called the 'Gateway Arch' to make sure people understood this fact about the city. One of my good friends was living in St. Louis in April of 2011 and we decided to run the half-marathon through the city. I had a crappy race, but it didn't deter from the fun weekend we had.

5 Things I Learned This Semester

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone! I hope your holidays were bright and happy and that you are looking forward to 2014. With the holidays behind us, my run for the day done, and the apartment to myself, I thought I would take a moment to catch up on some blogging.

Rather than ramble on about all the cool things I've thought about after one semester of grad school, I decided I'd give you a list of things I've learned this semester. Some pertain to school, while others pertain to life. It should get you caught up without having to do too much digging.

1). Urban Planning is Tough to Explain
I have been frustrated at times because people don't seem to be as thrilled about what I'm doing as I am. None of that matters of course, because its my passion, but I'm always reminded about how difficult my job will be because there is so little interest. Of course, then I remember that the planning profession is hardly defined and that I barely have an elevator pitch rehearsed much less practiced to get people excited.

Engaging in a conversation about planning usually results in two reactions. One reaction is that people will get a firm look on their face and say, 'good, we could use some planning in this town.' This reaction is always a bit puzzling because you could take that to mean a lot of different things. Ultimately I believe that when a person says that, there is something in their town that they don't really like and think it should be changed. At either rate when I begin to explain some of the things we've talked about in class the person either disengages or steers the conversation to something they want to talk about, usually public transit or pedestrian-friendly downtowns or in certain places the need for limited government and more freedom. At any rate, it makes it challenging to converse.

The second reaction is usually the more common of the two and the one where people immediately look puzzled and decide to ask more about it or simply say, 'well good for you. You like it? Good. Good.' In reflection of course, I'm not sure this is much different than any other job or profession that exists in the world, but the extra challenge with planning is that the profession itself really has no idea what it wants to focus on. I learned that this semester.

2). Urban Planning is About Cities and People
So what is it all about? Lots of things. Planning is about engaging communities to get involved at many different scales in thinking about their city and their place. Planners are trained to think about lots of different factors and disciplines in decision-making, but ultimately, planners are there to help the community make their city the way they want. It is because of this I'm excited to do it.

Of course, the difficult part of planning is that not all planners see the profession in this way. Some will say planning is all about design. Planners work to design spaces and places that encourage community and engagement, but I don't believe we can design our way to a better society. It helps yes, but it isn't the silver bullet to solve our city issues. Some planners will tell you that planners are all about data collection and forming and interpreting plans. Many people who say their town needs planning probably saw a master plan and believe their city needs one. However not all places need a master plan. The planners who believe this is what planner do are generally planners that went through school a few decades before me. In response to the disasters of urban renewal planner became pretty timid and decided that their role was only to enforce a plan and fight developers or the public when one becomes dissatisfied with the other. This kind of planning is boring to me.

I believe and have learned that planning has a real opportunity to make an impact on societal change, and if my classmates have anything to say about it, I do believe planners of the next generation will be focused on societal change, but change that is good for all and decided upon by all. I hope to be a catalyst for community oriented approaches in the communities I serve and believe that my training as a planner will help with this.

3). It's Hard to Blog During the Semester
This is no excuse, but I found it pretty challenging to put words together for this blog during the semester. I tried a few times and found that my brain was so tired I couldn't put anything interesting together. It was usually paragraphs mushed together that made little sense. I promise to do better, but I tell you now that between the reading, the assignments, the search for jobs and internships, and the push for other projects makes it really hard to blog.

4). Running is Good for my Soul
I know many people who would disagree with me and probably just threw their computers in outrage at this statement. I'll wait for them to collect their wits.

I did my best to continue running during this semester. It was tough, but I motivated myself with another race that I'll be participating in this January in Chicago. It will be cold, but it comes with some excellent race goodies and this will be state number six. I am more motivated than ever to work on qualifying for Boston. This means many more miles per week, cleaner eating, and more running. Janel got me a good cookbook for Christmas, which we'll be trying soon, but I also simply need to start upping my mileage. It takes time to do this without injury and it means doing a great job budgeting time.

When I did run this past semester, I found that my thoughts were clearer, I was able to focus on reading and my assignments better, and I had energy to sustain me through the tough times. I sacrificed some outdoor runs when it just seemed like too much work, but I have collected some new gear, including running tights, and I am prepared to go out in any kind of weather. Currently I am at 33 miles per week and I am looking to increase this after the Chicago race. The next state may be far away as I'm beginning to saturate the midwest. More to come on this later.

5). Hard Work Does Pay Off
It's really hard to remember this sometimes. Especially when you do so much hard work and the rewards are so tiny. I don't really care about good grades because I know how unimportant they are down the road, but they are the only thing I really have to show for hard work during the semester. The reality of course is that I have so much more knowledge, awareness, and honestly a deeper way of thinking about things than when I started school in September. This is the true reward.

Beyond school though, the choice of leaving work to go back to school has been difficult. I've had many nights wondering if I made the right choice and if it will pay off in the end. The realization I've made is that it is always worth it. In my old job I would always be frustrated with things not going fast enough, about feeling as though I wasn't connected to a bigger issue, and conflicted about the things I want to do for social change and the lack of attention I felt that my job allowed me to give there. This semester has forced me to think a lot about what I'm interested in and what I'm worried about and has given me new thoughts and ideas about where I want to go. None of that would be possible by playing it safe in the same old same old of my routine. It can be scary, but I've worked very hard to learn more and develop a new network of people and understand new concepts that I have never had to learn before. All the rewards aren't here yet, but I can feel them coming. And I'm more excited than ever about 2014. Happy New Year.


Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Milwaukee: Brewers Half Marathon

Brewers Mini Half-Marathon
Date: September 28, 2013
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Finish Time: 1:34:18
Pace: 7:11 min/mi


I've been to Milwaukee twice in my life. Both times were for very short stays, once for a job interview, and once for a race. A few weekends ago I was in Milwaukee racing in state number 5 on my quest to 50. In case you didn't see, I'm documenting all my races here, and will soon be adding notes about the other races. Without further ado, here is Milwaukee!

Monday, October 7, 2013

Reflection on Grad School: Month One

A few weeks ago I started chapter two in my life. Okay, maybe chapter six? Honestly, I don't know what chapter it is, but it's another chapter. If you've been reading this thing you know it's because I started grad school in September! Wahoo! After a month of school I thought it would be appropriate to give you all an update of how this chapter is going.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Detroit Half-Marathon

Detroit Half Marathon
Date: October 17, 2010
Location: Detroit, MI
Finish Time: 1:47:24
Pace: 8:12 min/mi



Usually runners work their way up in distance. The elusive 5K is one that is a huge accomplishment and one that can seem small compared to events like the marathon, but make no mistake, there are many, many people who have never run a 5K. After the 5K people usually run a 10K and slowly advance until one day a marathon is the only distance left (unless you count ultra-marathons and tri-athalons and so on). For me, I ran several 5Ks, a 10K, and then decided to run the full, completely disregarding what was standard in 'working up' towards greater distance. As a result, when people asked about my best half-marathon time, I had no answer to give them. Thus, my desire to run a half-marathon distance grew until I finally went for the run in Detroit.

I had just moved to Detroit in May and wanted to run another race. The notion of just missing four hours in the full marathon was eating at me and it had been some time since I'd trained. Doing the sensible thing this time, I decided to do a half-marathon before doing a full.

Detroit is really cool course. I'll start by saying that I really like to run in October. The weather is usually cool, but not cold, the sky is usually gray, but not depressing, and the sun isn't out in the morning, but rises as the race progresses. It makes for a very fun race.

What makes Detroit so unique is the international aspect of the race. Detroit begins down at the old Free Press building on Lafayette and progress downriver to the Ambassador Bridge. After a few loops, you make your way to Canada, up the river, and back to Detroit through the tunnel. After the tunnel, you get to run through parts of Corktown and end with a trip through Campus Martius to the finish line.

This particular day was like the one I described above. Up at 5 AM, I drove in with my Mom and Dad from Dearborn and walked in to the starting area. Detroit has a corralled start, meaning that the faster runners are set off first and slower runners go out in waves. Each section starts a few minutes after the last to ensure that there is not a big glob of runners all trying to cross the one lane on the Ambassador Bridge. I've found that the corralled start is helpful, but doesn't keep the bunching from happening. And during this race, I believe my time was so good because of that bunched start. I was kept at a snail's pace for the first several miles, only being able to really break into a stride after clearing Canadian customs. By the time I made it back to Detroit, I was at mile 8 and feeling good. So I pushed it and finished in a very respectable time.

Besides being bunched up, I remember a few key moments of the race. The first thing I noticed was how joyful the Canadian cheerleaders were along the riverfront. They may have been aided by the fact that by the time I reached them it was nearly 8 o'clock and daylight, versus the first American cheerleaders who were still in the dark and cold of early morning. For whatever reason, the Canadian road was lined with lots of people who were more than excited for us to be running by. Maybe it's Canadian hospitality. Maybe it's that Canada only has about a mile to support the runner. Whatever it is, I think its a great part of the race.

The other thing I remember is just how hot the tunnel is. The crisp October air is so refreshing when you're cruising along starting mile 7, but when you enter into the tunnel, all that air goes away. The sounds echo off the walls and you can only hear panting of other runners slipping into the zone. The walls are also very blank, and you're doing this for a mile. Normally, I like to run a mile and enjoy my scenery, but when there isn't much to look at, it becomes very easy to get mentally bogged down by the pace and the breathing. Nothing is more satisfying than emerging from the tunnel and seeing Jefferson Street lined to the brim with people there to support runners. The fresh air, the cheering, and the notion of being back in the daylight is so refreshing that it powered me through to the finish. My mom and dad were along the row of people cheering and taking photos. Its always good to see your family along the way.

The final note I remember is running into Campus Martius. As you run down wide Michigan Avenue, you pass the Book Cadillac Hotel and the rival coney islands and enter into the heart of downtown Detroit. At the park there are large signs signaling marathoners to the left and half-marathoners to the right. For the half, you're almost done. This section of the race is completely filled with cheerers, gates to keep runners safe from the crowd, and beautiful tall buildings around you. This is one of my favorite parts of the city and it is so invigorating to see so many people cheering you, the runner, on to the finish.

Detroit has been one of my favorite races. Its well organized, the communication is strong, the race is fun and there are some cool things to see along the way. It was also my best race for quite some time. I felt very welcomed to Detroit after this race and am happy to have participated. Little did I know that this would be the start of something much bigger, as my appetite for races grew.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Bayshore Marathon

Bayshore Marathon
Date: May 23, 2009
Location: Traverse City, MI
Finish Time: 4:01:36
Pace: 9:13 min/mi

My first race was the Bayshore Marathon in 2009. I had graduated college in April and knew long before May that I wanted to run a marathon. It was a big move to go from a 10K to a marathon and I was nervous for months leading up to the race. But when the day came, I was ready to go and excited for the chance to accomplish something great!


Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Do you run with a Phone?

I've seen recommendations before that music is a good thing to have while doing a work-out. Something about the rhythm of the beat when timed with your exercise makes you do better. As I mentioned previously, I can't run with music, mostly because I can't get earbuds to stay in my ears. And yes, I've tried different kinds of earbuds and yes my ears are big and should hold buds, but they don't.

Anyway, I have a reader submitted question. Jay asks,

"I know you don't run with music. But do you run with a phone? I always have a phone with me when I run, mostly for music but also because I figure if I trip and fall in a ditch I could call for help. Do you have a plan for emergencies? Like making sure Janel knows your route? Cash for water?"

These are legitimate questions. My answer is: it depends. 

Monday, September 9, 2013

5 Things I've Learned From Running

I've posted before about how running for me is something that I do to keep myself sharp. Its something I do to stay one step ahead of the game. Its something I do because I like to do it. One of the added bonuses to running is that it can serve as a great analogy for lots of things in life. Here are five things I've learned after lacing up my running shoes.

Thursday, September 5, 2013

What Do I Think About While Running?

Is this a good pace? Is that car going to stop? Did I put the chicken out for dinner? Am I running too fast? Why am I so tired? Did I eat enough before this run? Was that a grasshopper up my shorts? AHH, it's a grasshopper up my shorts!

I think about a lot on my runs. The longer the run, the more time I have to think about things. There are some Saturdays when I'm running long distances where I could easily be gone for several hours. I never take an iPod with me, mostly because I can't ever get the ear buds to stay in my ears. The question always comes up though, what are you thinking about on your long runs?

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

First Day of School

I wasn't late. I found all my classes. I didn't even fall asleep once! It turns out that it was a pretty good day. I even got a job today! It might only be work-study and only a few hours per week, but with all the reading I'm going to do, I think it will work out just fine.

Monday, September 2, 2013

The Start of Something New

The day is here. Tuesday is upon us. The day where I cease being an adult and head back to school. My bags are packed. I'm nervous about whether the other kids will like me. I hope I can find a seat on the bus. I hope my peanut butter and jelly doesn't get flattened and make a mess all over the sandwich bag.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Being Spontaneous


I like to plan things in advance. One of my roles in my recently vacated job was to plan an event calendar one year in advance. I usually have my weekends scheduled months in advance and I once scheduled my July vacation in January.

Last Friday I was sent a frantic message from Janel, "RESPOND ASAP! I HAVE BIG NEWS!" What on earth could this mean? I sent a quick chat on Google and discovered the amazing news. Mumford and Sons, one of our favorite bands and one of the bands that we have had special moments with was playing at a concert stop in Troy, OH. I wasn't exactly sure where Troy was, but I knew Ohio was close and Mumford and Sons rarely plays in the USA.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Running on Trust

A funny thing happened while I was out on my run this weekend. It was a strange thing that I've never, ever experienced before. As I approached a driveway to Gordon Food Service a truck was waiting for traffic to clear in the path of the sidewalk. It was an old chevy truck, blue with rust spots over the tires and a cap on the back.

When I usually arrive at a situation like this, I start looking for alternatives. Nothing sucks more than to be out on a long run, come towards the end when you're getting tired, and having to stop dead in your tracks for a car in your path. I usually look for a gap behind the car, for the start of the sidewalk on the other side, safe footing for my feet to traverse, and eye contact with the driver.

As I said, a strange thing happened. The truck slowly started to move backwards. The man inside had seen me coming and moved his truck out of my path so that I could safely cross. We made eye contact, he nodded with a smile and both hands on the wheel, I gave a small wave and mouthed 'thank you,' to show my appreciation.

Moments like these give me hope in humanity.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Sunday Stats

In an effort to do more to track my running and simply to share a bit more about my trainings, here are my stats from the week. I started tracking on Wednesday, so next week will be a full week.

Sunday: Off
Monday: 3 Mile Run
Tuesday: 4 Mile Run
Wednesday: 7 Mile Run; 1:10
Thursday: 7 Mile Run; 0:56
Friday: 3 Mile Run; 0:32
Saturday: 12 Mile Run; 2:00

Here is a look at a tracking source that I have been using. This is from Mapmyrun.com.


Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Running in the Suburbs

I'm not entirely sure how it happened, but somehow I was doing a very poor job running for several weeks and the Milwaukee Half-Marathon is now six weeks away. And grad school starts in two weeks. YAY!

To make some excuses for not running, it was really hot in July (and then it wasn't for several weeks.) BUT, during those weeks I went to two weddings and moved. And that was a lot of new stuff. I still went out for runs, but I had so many other things I'd rather do. And I have to get up earlier. So, yeah, excuses.

The other thing that's bugged me is that I can't quite find a running route I particularly like. The new apartment is nestled in between three very large roads, two of which are expressways, and the third of which is a major US highway.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Running With Confidence

I don't remember the very first time I ever went for a run. I do remember the days we ran the mile in gym class, and boy was that rough. There was something dreadful about changing into shorts, trekking out the quarter mile oval surrounding the football field, and slowly starting to jog around for four laps, all while watching the star football player literally running laps around you. The goal was 12 minutes for a mile, and dang that was tough.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

50 State Challenge

As usual, its been a long time since I've blogged. I could put together a string of excuses or talk about the things that you've missed in the time that's passed, but mostly all I can say is that I've been a bit lazy and unmotivated to write. True, there are always interesting things happening, but nothing that seems, blog-worthy.

But, alas, I found an idea. Recently I was taking a look at the Milwaukee Mini-Marathon website. I'm running this race on September 28 and wanted to see what kind of course it was. It never really matters to me, but I always like to do a quick streetview to see what I can expect. 

The Milwaukee race is part of my quest to run at least a half-marathon distance in every state before I turn 50. A 50 by 50 challenge or a 50 states challenge or just a silly and idiotic goal that I want to complete. As I looked at the race, I wondered what others have done who run lots of races. I would have been shocked if I were the only person who ever thought of running in all 50 states. 

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Tennis: An Analogy for Life?

It isn't often I get to serve up a tennis analogy. It isn't often I get to use puns either. Today is a special day.

Back in high school I played tennis. I loved it. All of it. I loved going to practice. I loved hitting tons of forehands and backhands and serving for hours. I had a hopper filled with tennis balls that I would take out on hot summer nights and serve to no one until I could no longer see the lines due to darkness.

Tennis was fun. And I loved the sport of it. I never dreamed of becoming a state champion or being the best player in the school. And neither of those things happened. I simply enjoyed tennis and wanted to play as much as I could.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Perfection and Patience

Every Tuesday evening since early January I have rushed home from work, snuck in a quick run, and gobbled down a leftover dinner so that I could make it to the local community college for choir rehearsal. Yes, it's true, I joined the Dearborn Community Chorus. It has been 5 weeks or so and it has certainly been an adventure.

Like any good community chorus, the majority of people are older community members looking to keep singing. When I say older, I mean anyone under 60 years old is considered a spring chicken. That makes me a regular baby.

The chorus requires no audition, all you need to do is come to the first rehearsal, pay some dues to the city for rental space and music purchase, and then you hop into whatever section you sing. For me this is a section filled with older gentleman who like to over-sing, complain about notes above the middle of bass clef, and who almost always sing under the pitch. This is the bass section in a community choir.

My first day at the choir was an interesting one. I arrived and was immediately greeted by a very friendly tenor who introduced himself as Alex. He was the only other guy there that didn't have grey hair (or hair dye.) The room is a typical choir room, raised platforms with chairs, music posters all over the room with do, re, mi and a blank staff on the board. The piano sat in the middle of the room with the accompanist and the director who reminded me a lot of my high school choir director.

We started without warm-up and jumped into the music- jazz standards. For these men and women, jazz is not something they know. Their church choirs are generally songs that require straight singing, none of the fancy stuff in jazz. (Do we sing the full 'doot' and 'dot' when doing this scat section?) Imagine listening to Ella Fitzgerald enunciating her 't's. Its just comical to think about. Its comical to hear too.

After that first rehearsal I was a bit skeptical about the group. I chalked it up to the first rehearsal and decided that as time went on, we were bound to get better. As each week passes I've come to realize that the group struggles a bit. We've learned about what eighth notes and eighth rests are. We've talked about swing rhythm and how a flat is only a half step lower than the pitch that is written.

As I sat bored with the music, wondering when we would worry about breaths and phrasing and vowels and intonation, I began to realize that this choir just might not be as good as I remember choirs being. The community choir in Hillsdale had the elements of over-singing and basses under-pitch, but we could still make some pretty nice music. This choir seems to really struggle.

This past week was nearly the kicker for me. I sat listening to the director and listening to people in the choir who were doing all the things he asked us not to do. I listened to the bass behind me who reminded me of the kid in high school that was always at least 10 pitches under the real pitch. I found myself singing louder in places where I heard the bass section was wrong. I found another musician next to me who helped lead the bass section.

It was then that I realized I was back in high school choir. Instead of my friend Isaac next to me, it was this man Ray anchoring the basses. The kid behind me was that red head in my class who could never hit the pitch. The soprano who would always correct the director was that one girl who thought she knew more about music. And the mistakes that we had corrected a few weeks ago were still showing up this week when we returned to the music, counting errors and incorrect pitches and consonants in the right spots.

I was frustrated. And then I remembered that back in high school it wasn't about perfection in music. It wasn't about getting it right in the fifth rehearsal. It was okay that sometimes rehearsals just kind of sucked because you knew we'd get it in time. Music is always about the experience. Its always about spending the time working and working and doing things again and again and knowing that when the concert comes you're still probably going to make mistakes, but you were able to share music with others.

Recently I've been reading about living in the moment, experiencing the process, and sharing a moment with others. While I think this applies in so many aspects of life, this is especially easy to identify in this chorus. We won't be perfect. There will be a lot of things that I wish we could do a bit better. But right now, I'm enjoying singing again. I'm enjoying being a part of a choir and making music, even if it isn't always that great. Its fun to have a section of music that is tough because one day it will click. When it does, that whole process was worth it.

It isn't about being perfect. And it isn't about being patient for perfection to appear. Its about being patient with the fact that right now, at that moment, I am enjoying the music that we are making. I am enjoying the people I am with. I am enjoying the process of making music. And that process leads to a kind of perfection that we should all strive for in every moment of our lives. The fact that where we are and what we are doing is exactly where we are supposed to be and what we are supposed to be doing. Often it is difficult to figure out what that is until after the fact, but one day, it will all make perfect sense.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Lost? in the suburbs

My best friend in my office is a 57 year-old Hawaiian woman with a huge heart and a hearty laugh. She and I have tons of conversations about life and the way to live and the hot topics of the day. We chat about Detroit and the future of the city and we chat about politics. We even dabble in the spiritual realm sometimes, but our opinions differ and we don't ever wish to offend each other.

My friend has a loud voice that carries and she talks a lot. Usually she makes sense and has a point, but sometimes her message is lost. I always listen patiently and massage the message because usually she always has an important message to say.

A lot of people in the office think she talks too much and spends too much time with appointments. I think she speaks when she has something to say and is by far the best person in our office when it comes to forming relationships with students and staff. No other counselor is requested nearly as often as she is.

We had dinner on Friday night at the Green Dot Stables in Corktown, a place known for their sliders and truffle fries. It was crowded and the night was snowy, but we had a great time chatting about life, as we always do. Today she told me about how she told our co-worker about the restaurant. Our co-worker had never heard of the place and my friend said, "If you want to know anything about downtown, you need to talk to David."

This statement was profound to me. It wasn't shocking, by any means. I pride myself on getting involved with Detroit and knowing the city. But, I think back to when I wrote the title of this blog: Lost in the Suburbs.

The title was very intentional. When I started this blog I had recently moved to Dearborn unsure of myself, unsure of my place, unsure of my future and figuratively and literally lost. I had gained so much confidence and millennial pride after having a great college experience only to have my confidence shattered over a year of unemployment and living at home. While friends ventured off to grad school or AmeriCorps or full-fledged jobs in full-fledged cities I was stuck in Kalamazoo and Hillsdale and everywhere but where I wanted to go.

I searched aimlessly for a job in higher education or adventure education or politics and government only to find that rejection emails and letters were polite and in most cases it was standard to never hear from a place at all. My confidence was shaken. Was I good enough to make it? Did I do enough in college to prove worthy? Was I just a big fish in a small pond?

When I arrived in Dearborn I was wounded. I had finally landed a job, but I quickly realized that entry level paychecks don't go as far as we would like. I vowed to live a simple life, but still desired to have a cool apartment and new gadgets and a nice car. And worst of all, I was stuck in Detroit, a place that seemed to have perpetual gloom and depression hanging throughout every undefined suburb.

It was in this moment of misery that I started this blog. Mostly I wanted to prove to my friends that Detroit had something going for it; my friends who seemingly had it all in exotic locations like Chicago and St. Louis. I was stuck in a city that people didn't want to be in, that people didn't want to visit, that people didn't want to care about and I was stuck in a place that I fell into because I needed a job. I constantly remind myself that at one time in life I wanted a graduate degree in higher education.

After having been involved in college with organizations with built in friendships, I found that breaking into a city like Detroit is a hard thing to do. When you're the youngest person in your office and mistakenly identified as a student constantly at your place of work, it became hard to find friendships. If the office is filled with people you can't relate to and the community is filled with students I should maintain a professional distance from, what am I to do?

And I worked furiously to maintain relationships with my friends from college who now lived all over the country. I even put their names on a map on my wall so that I knew where I could go to escape my imprisonment.

One day when I was reading my blog I realized that it was incredibly depressing. Things were never cheery or funny, just constant complaints about how rotten things were. And it was at that moment that I decided I needed a new topic to write about. I determined that I should discover the city I was living in. I should write about places I discovered, good or bad, and work to find the character of this city. As I said earlier, I was determined to prove to my friends that my life was cool too.

As I started this project, I started by sharing experiences at attractions and restaurants. I decided to take alternative routes to get places, just to explore the roads. I liked to drive to new neighborhoods to see if things were really as bad as they say. I worked to find the closest locations for things like movies and pizza and tried to find my favorite bars. I talked to people in these places and scoured blogs for tips on where to go in the city. And slowly, I discovered there were cool things happening.

When my attitude started to change about Detroit I recognized that I needed to make a few things happen. First, I removed everyone's name from my map. The names only caused anxiety in me as I felt that I should be somewhere else or doing something else or that someone, somewhere was having more fun than I was. Second, I deleted my facebook. I was completely exhausted with trying to maintain a profile and I found I was always watching to see where people were that I was not. Third, I embraced the city I was in. I recognized that I was on my own, living in my own place, never having to fear about where my next meal was coming from and with plenty of cash to explore the city.

Through all of this I discovered things about myself that I only now have the chance to reflect upon. I discovered that I am in fact okay with being alone. I like myself enough that I have a good time being a bit naive and exploratory and talking to strangers. I found that when I waited for friends to do things, they often cancelled or didn't want to do the things I wanted to or took weeks to respond. I was wasting so much time when I could have been out doing things on my own.

I discovered that I enjoy Detroit and I enjoy simplicity. A fancy apartment does not give me happiness. New gadgets do not give me happiness. A new car does not give me happiness. I am happy when I discover something new. I am happy when I talk to someone about deep subjects. I am happy when I can sit and enjoy the peace of a warm summer day.

As this transpired I began to understand my place. For too long I spent time pining for the past, wishing things could go back to the way they were. And even if I wasn't wishing for the old days, I was still holding on to old friendships and memories that were long gone.

I realized that I had no vision for my future. I was not always thrilled about my job or my apartment or Detroit, but I had no alternate vision. I wasn't sure what I wanted. As quoted from "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland:"


“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to."
"I don't much care where –"
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go.”


I understood from this experience that I was exactly where I needed to be and that I needed to let go. I needed to let things happen and experience things. I needed to find what motivated me and what I liked. And ultimately I found that I was excited by Detroit. I was excited by progress. I was excited by potential in leaders and in neighborhoods and in people. It drove me to envision a future for myself. It is a vision that is constantly changing, mostly because it isn't here yet. Yet I now have a drive and can both be reminded of the past, appreciate my present, and prepare for the future.

While I have no plans for changing the title, I can, at this time question, whether I am still truly lost in the suburbs.



Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Bumper Stickers

Let me begin by saying this: if you are going to have a bumper sticker or vanity plate, please make sure it makes sense to those who see it. There have been countless plates lately with such odd collections of numbers and letters that I don't understand I usually cry out in fits of rage.

Bumper stickers are better, but I absolutely hate when the text is too small or the saying doesn't make sense. In general though, bumper stickers were designed by someone trying to make a statement. A personal favorite of mine: 'My Labrador is smarter than your honors student.' Its big, its easy to understand, and I get a nice little chuckle. Job well done.

This weekend I saw another 'A+' bumper sticker. It was on a small pick-up truck with dirty windows and all it said was, 'I pooped today.'

Let the crassness pass. Maybe let your laughter subside. I'll give you a moment. Okay. You good?

Excellent. Now think about this for a moment. I think there is a certain amount of genius in this. I don't know if the person who had this did so to better ID their car, because they were trying to be funny, or if they were trying to make a statement. Whatever the reasons this particular bumper sticker graced their window it made me think of two things: 1) 'Hey, I pooped today too, we must be pretty similar.' and 2) sometimes celebrating life's little accomplishments are all you need.

The first part of that thought made me far less aggressive with this particular driver. When someone shares with you that they pooped, you have a connection with that person. Maybe its the connection of shared experiences. Maybe its the connection of sharing intimate details about life. Whatever it is, I had this guys' back, no matter what. 'Hey, you go ahead and come into my lane, you pooped today!'

The second part of my thought, the thought about how celebrating life's little accomplishments is all you need is really what got me thinking. On my wall I had a manifesto from Lululemon. There are many motivational quotes like, 'Do one thing a day that scares you,' and stuff like that. One quote always puzzled me: 'The Pursuit of Happiness is the Source of All Unhappiness.'

Ponder that for a moment. We're all taught about the pursuit of happiness. For those of you who forgot, its in the Declaration of Independence. Tom Jefferson wrote about it as an unalienable right. We as a people have the chance to go out and try to find happiness. Its liberating. Its awesome to think about. Its terrifying for most of us today.

I think much of this terror comes from the fact that we have so many influences on our life that try to tell us what happiness looks like. Is it gobs of money? Is it a nice house? Is it a great job? What is it exactly that makes us happy? In a quest to find the answers we begin to reach for all the things we think we need. We don't make enough money so we search for ways to make more, only to become disappointed when we can't make what we thought we needed. We want a nice house, but become distraught when we can't afford the luxury we want. We strive for a great career and find ourselves stuck behind an office desk wondering when we can escape.

The pursuit of happiness is often the exact cause for unhappiness in our lives, a notion that we don't have what we want so we must not be happy. I look at it as that one thing you search and search for and no matter how hard you try to find it, you can't. And then, one day you stop looking. You give up the search and suspect you will never find it. You let it go. And suddenly, there it is, exactly where you left it. This, I think, is the pursuit of happiness. When you stop trying so hard to get the things to make you happy you might find that you are already there.

I pooped today. Such a simple statement. Something that sounds proud. If that person accomplished nothing else today, they can be happy with the fact that their bowels are under control. Sometimes these simple things are enough. We can always strive to be better, but what is it that makes us better? Your wallet and your house and your job don't really care about how your day was, but the people in your life do. Chances are the secret to happiness lies not in the things we think we need to pursue, but in the small joys and accomplishments of the day.

So the next time you are having a tough day and thinking about your personal weaknesses or things you didn't do correctly; the next time you think you don't have enough money or a good house or a good job, just remember that you did accomplish something today. You pooped. And even if today was not that kind of a day, there's a good bet that tomorrow will be. Enjoy the simple things in life and happiness will find a way to you.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Why I Run

With the new year come new hopes and aspirations. As I stated last time, I have applied to graduate school, something that for me represents a new challenge as an individual. I hope that I will learn and grow, but also try my hand at something that I feel has great value to the world as a whole. Corny and cliched? Maybe. But it feels good.

As I also stated last time, self-doubt has crept in. Will I be good enough to be accepted? What if I don't? Will I be stuck doing something I don't want to forever? How will I pursue what I want to pursue? What can I do to keep growing, develop skills, and find my next great adventure?

Naturally, all of this is a bit scary. Self-doubt is incredibly crippling. If you allow yourself to be overcome by negative thoughts posed by others or more often by yourself, it is very often that those doubts become reality, a never-ending spiral into dark places. It becomes so tough to escape and easily seeps into the other areas of your life: relationships, day-to-day activities, and your overall health. It is terrible to be caught in this trap and I wondered how I would ever be able to persevere.

Until I started to think about running.

People often ask me why I run. Usually its a very indirect question such as, why would you ever want to run that far? Some people will try to talk about the dangers of running or the joints I'll have to replace as a deterrent, but I am too far into it to stop. The truth is that I run for a lot of different reasons, and the more I run, the more those reasons change and grow.

When I first started running I was a person who believed that running was only good if you could chase a ball. If there were no reason to run, what was the point? It seems silly that we would want to run for miles and miles with no real reason other than to do it. How is it possible?

My first race I trained for was a 5K with the intent of finishing. At the time, running a mile brought up terrible memories of high school gym class, huffing around the track. Running 3.1 miles was just crazy. But, when I started, it was simply because I knew other people who had run a 5K and thought, 'I want to do that too.' It started as a means to accomplishment.

After that race I felt pretty good. I realized that a 5K wasn't that bad. I was tired, but I also recall thinking about that one place where I stopped running for a few moments. I thought about how I could have started a little slower to run the entire time. I could have run faster, harder, better.

So I decided to do another race. And another. And increase the distance. And soon I recognized that I wanted to one day do a marathon. And I wanted to do a marathon before I started my 'real life' because I wanted to have a sense of accomplishment. So I decided that I would do the Bayshore Marathon in May of my senior year of college. Mostly because I wanted to say I had run a marathon.

Marathon training is hard work. I started training around Christmas for the race in May, running nearly every day. With every race I run, I always sign-up before the training begins. I do this not because I'm worried of getting a spot in the race, but because with the cost of a non-refundable entry fee, I am obligated to train.

Training for a spring race in Michigan means fighting the biting cold in January and February, running when its dark, running on ice and snow, and wearing multiple layers upon layers to log those miles. It isn't always fun and there are many days it seems downright crazy.

But, the truth is that there will always be an excuse if you let there be. I could have said that it was too dark, I was too tired, it was too cold to go running. But, I knew that when March rolled around it would be too windy. And in April it would be too muddy. And when the race came in May, I wouldn't be ready.

So, I ran every day. I ran increasing miles. I ran even though I was taking 17 credit hours, president of the largest organization on campus, actively involved on 2 other boards, participating in Alternative Spring Break, and working about 15 hours a week. To say my schedule was packed is an understatement.

Training for a marathon requires logging miles. But, the truth is that the hardest part of a marathon is not the distance. The hardest part of the marathon is the voice in your head that says you can't do it. The hardest part is the people who say you can't do it. The hardest part is that time when you are tired, and worn, and the work you are doing is hard, but you push through. The training is there to remind you that you CAN do it and have in fact, trained to do it.

Today I have accomplished 2 full marathons, 3 half marathons, and have a full scheduled in June and am contemplating a half in April. I fully intend on running a half or full marathon in every state before I turn 50. I intend on doing this because running, for me, is a wonderful metaphor for life.

As self-doubt tries to cripple me before my first big life decision, I remind myself of running.

Running is accomplishment. Running is attitude. Running is tenacity and determination. Running is meditation. Running is perseverance.

That is why I run. I run to remind myself that I can. I can run those extra miles. I can get up in the morning. I can pack my schedule with life. I can persevere through the hardest times.

We all run a marathon in life. Sometimes it is a bit of hard work. Sometimes we just don't want to get up in the morning. We have a choice, though. We've already signed up for the race. We can either train for it, or watch as the race passes us by. But you'll always regret not running the race. You will never regret the hard work it took to accomplish your goals.